“It has been a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day. My mom says some days are like that.”

I have always loved this book and the quote with mom simply saying some days are like that. The reality is that some days, situations or interactions are - just like that. No matter how much we prepare, or how ready we are, it ends up all going wrong. Many times, the situation is completely out of our control or we listen to someone else against our better judgement. Sometimes things just don’t work out. So, what do we do when life feels like it is falling apart?

1) Feel it. Yes, it didn’t go the way you planned. Yes, it sucks. The best way to deal with it is to allow all of your feelings. Get upset, cry, get angry, scream, laugh, just don’t lash out at anyone. But do what you need to release your pain. Let it out. Holding on is like the pressure building in a pressure cooker, if it isn’t released it will explode. Feelings are like the weather, they change, so be in the moment you are in and just feel. No matter how intense, just feel.

2) Remember that you are not the only one. When struggling people often feel like no one else could ever understand. The thing is, although your experience is unique to you, it is often like so many others. All humans have experienced hurt and sorrow, so remember you are not alone or the first person to feel this way And know that you will get through it.

3) Go to nature. I am a true believer that fresh air and sunshine are nature’s anti-depressants. Get outside to nature BREATE it in. Notice all the beauty and wonder, look up at the sky and recognize how massive the universe is and remember this too will pass.

4) Focus on your breathing. Take slow deep breaths. Our breathing regulates our stress response so focus on your breathing, relax your shoulders, loosen your jaw and allow yourself to release your stress. Breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth. Or as I was once informed and now share often, smell the flowers and blow out the birthday candles.

5) Lastly, find someone to talk to. Share with someone you trust. Talk it out, or as we say in therapy process it. Discuss the what, how and why you are feeling this way. Recognize that feelings are good, even the ones we don’t like. They tell us something isn’t right for us.

Let me help. Corey